I’ve already started my first semester in music and it was really exciting. I got my confirmation from my Papa to study and so I pursued it. So my first day of class was so new to me that I got really terrified and realize right away that it was a long time since I was exposed to people wherein I need to interact with them and introduced myself as a first year student. Many of them were thinking that I was so young and they’re awfully mistaken hahah. Anyway it was terrifying, I went to my first class and nobody wanted to talk to me and well I don’t know how to approach them as well. I saw a friend from another band there and we exchanged a little conversation but not too friendly so I still felt like I don’t know anyone. I was really lost in the sea of faces and it was so frustrating. I even felt like my heart was about to explode on my second day because I felt like nobody wants to talk to me, even my classmates in music. So I just want to cry but that would be too dramatic, right?
On my 3rd day, that would be earlier, I made some improvement because one of my classmate in my voice class talk to me and began to asked me if I love K-pop, I was embarrassed by that so I told her that “no, it’s my hair” and many of my classmates and higher years were asking that question if I am a korean or calling me K-pop! it was so embarrassing. Many more humiliating moments there, like my teacher asking me why I enrolled as a piano major when I am still a grade zero piano player, eating candy after the vocalization and again my hair! My classmate are pretty cruel as well, because they laugh when my teacher told me about the hair and called me K-pop. Or maybe they don’t really mean to hurt or taunt me but it feels like it. I felt so inferior to them, but I remind myself that I’m here because of a dream and I know I’ll make it. I am not giving up! I will pursue it until I get to be a pro! I don’t know when but I will eventually, by God’s grace. 😀
I’ve been working as an online employee for companies abroad for about 4 years now. I started to work right after graduation and it was a good one although I was going through a nasty break up that time. The job taught me a lot about how to work online and how to effectively communicate with different people outside my country. I don’t have any complaints about any of them because most of the companies I’ve work for are so professional and good to me; however, after years of working I got to the point where I wasn’t happy anymore. I know what my passion really is: Music. I wanted to play the piano, I wanted to create beautiful melodies so badly. I know what I was called to do: Singing for God and I want to do it with excellence. I don’t want to be stuck on what I already know, I wanted to explore the different dimension of this part of heaven; music is a part heaven, it connects people, it touches us, it stores memories and it gives meaning to things that seems meaningless. I am person who doesn’t take risk, I don’t have the required confidence to achieve something awesome; I always thought that I am only average and greatness are reserved only for special people. However, there’s one thing that I fought really hard just to achieved it: worship leading, I cried too many times because I wanted to sing for God, many people hate my voice but God has a way to prune us and I was tested by fire just to achieved where I am right now, not yet perfect but getting there. So in connection, I wanted to compose songs and I need to play one instrument, I know how to play the guitar but I am not that good and besides my dream instrument is piano. I dreamed that I went to a college on top of a hill and the school is run by nuns and the place was so beautiful. The second dream was I did go back to college as an english major. I didn’t paid much attention to it but I secretly desire it.
And just recently my mama messaged me asking if I wanted to go back to school and I was surprised because she told me that she’ll let me go back and she’s gonna pay for it. I was happy but I was very indecisive on what course to take up until I fell asleep thinking of declining my mom’s offer since I can’t decide and I’m not sure if I can actually carry on. I woke up and one word came to my mind immediately: MUSIC, I was really amused with myself that I haven’t thought about that. So I told my mama, she laughed at me for a moment because she thought that I won’t earn a lot with that after I graduate but I was persistent so she consented. This coming semester I will be enrolling in a college that offers music course, major in piano run by nuns! haha they have a good reputation with music and that’s great! Just by thinking about it I feel really excited, I smile often now haha My mama will buy me a piano and I am superduper excited about it. I know that along the way I will meet pressures, sadness, discouragement but I will read this post whenever I’ll feel any of those and will remind myself to keep pushing forward! This is my lifelong dream, the only thing I will be good at doing, I don’t have good fingers yet but I know that I have good ears, good emotions so I think that would be enough and also a lot of perseverance, so for now that would be sufficient, I hope! :)))
“Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second’s encounter with God and with eternity.” – The Alchemist
I felt so blessed that I was able to visit Tagaytay last summer for a seminar. The place is wonderful, food was great and music was so heavenly. It was like a vacation for all of us because we were able to rest from all the work and enjoy the presence of God. It was a seminar for intercessors, pastors and musicians (worship leaders). Jill Shannon, Robert Misst are the speakers and the sessions are really powerful. 24/7 IHOP system are introduced by Jill and I was crying like a baby, I was only dreaming that 24/7 houses of prayer will be established in our city last year, I never thought that it will come to pass this year. The Lord’s faithfulness and goodness never ceases to amaze me.
Sunrise – We need to wake up at 5am for our morning prayer and it was so cold.
The view from the window
The whole place
Excited to visit picnic grove and get a glimpse of Taal Volcano for the first time.
It has been a super busy summer for me this year and there’s a sense of urgency in everything. We’re trying to put up 24/7 houses of prayer in our city and different churches are trained for the work. However in the midst of all this preparation, God surely gives wonderful moments to remember. I was able to fly to Manila for a 2 week training for intercession and worship, it was a wonderful and heavenly experience. A man of God which is used in the area of business sponsored everything from accommodation to almost every expenses used on the training so I felt super blessed!
Here are the pictures taken during our flight to Manila.
We ‘re all excited!
A glimpse of heaven. I was like a little child trying to capture everything.
I realize it before but more clearly now that people believe in God once they’ve encountered the worst in life. My brother met an accident yesterday and was taken to the hospital with a broken leg. He really thought that he would die that instant, he suddenly called unto God for forgiveness of all his sins and asks for salvation. Sometimes humans want to live a life without limitations and convictions, we just want to be happy without anything to be concern about and because of that mindset, we chose not to believe in God.
Due to the stupidity of men we tend to deny the existence of a higher Being, we brush off the truth that men are weak and the reality that these weaknesses will one day cause our death. It is very confusing on how men want to believe the theory of evolution when in fact I find it very idiotic, it’s a faint attempt to explain the existence of things just to get out from the responsibility of living a blameless life, knowing that one day a God will judge us according to how we’ve live the life He has given.
I don’t know much but I know a little, with the truth that one day all flesh will come to an end. I would rather be living my life for something that will last for eternity rather pursuing things that will someday lead me to eternal damnation. How tragic it would be for people who didn’t believe that God exist and then finds out in the end that He actually did. This life is but for a moment, you’ll never know when it’s gonna end. Decide wisely because time is too short for delays and denials.
I was upset the other day because some members of my team didn’t showed up for our practice. I am not the best person in our set but I try to be excellent in every way because what I’m doing is not for men but for God, that’s why I’m a little frustrated about the whole situation. Food eases out every negative emotions in me so I wanted to vent out everything in a bowl of rice! Well after the practice, the other worship leaders wanted to go out and drink coffee, i love that idea but the sad thing is I have this discipline that everytime I lead the worship the next day, I don’t drink coffee or anything that will dry up my throat. After a little discussion we’ve decided to eat rice instead, so we all went to Rosario Arcade. It’s a place where restaurants, cafe and bars are located.
We all agreed to eat at Gerry’s Grill, they serve Filipino dishes and grilled meat. I love Sinigang pork a lot so obviously we ordered it along with Chicken lollipops and a lot of rice. Their Sinigang pork is not that good because the pork is not too tender in my opinion but Chicken lollipop is simply the best! It was an amazing night because I was able to relax and chitchat with my friends. The pictures that you’ll see below are taken from my crappy camera, so forgive me.
Yum! Sinigang pork and chicken lollipop with rice!
My Hot Calamansi Juice since I’m not allowed to drink anything cold! boohoo 😦
I used to hear Huckleberry Hound sing this song with his southern drawl and just loving it without actually knowing who Clementine was. I was able to listened to this song again with a different rendition and was stunned by the realization of its content. It’s a nursery rhyme so I was assuming that its lyrics would be shallow, fit for a kid. However after listening and learning the song I realized that it conveys a very sad story.
Clementine’s lover boar the ordeal of watching her drowned and can’t do anything because he can’t swim. It was as if he was crying while watching her trying to escape death but doing nothing because he don’t want to die either. That’s ridiculous and selfish in my opinion. He missed her hugs and kisses, so he comfort himself with Clementine’s little sister. I don’t like that part at all. Call me anything but I cried after hearing about her father’s sorrow. Her father was a miner and after learning about her daughter’s death, he fell into a deep sorrow that leads him to kill himself and join his daughter’s grave.
Anyway here’s a stunning rendition of the song by Sweptaway.