sense of wonder, it’s one thing that I love about myself before. I always see beauty in everything, in everywhere I go. The certain glow of sunshine, specifically around 2pm, sunsets, sunrise, windy afternoon, starry skies, big full moon, winding roads, seeing my destination road from afar (I’m not sure how to explain it properly). Whenever I look at people and where they live, a person biking while bringing bread, I imagine him coming home and enjoying it with his family over a cup of coffee, it brings warmth in my heart. I love seeing houses in the mountains, I don’t know how to explain it, by I love the feeling that they also have something exciting or relaxing to do up there. That warm feeling, that sense of wonder. I somehow lost or maybe forgotten it, I miss it terribly. I always ask myself how I’ve lost it, maybe adulthood did, maybe certain events in my life that disillusioned me.
Today, I realized why. I didn’t lost my appreciation of things, I didn’t lost that sense of wonder, but I lost the time to appreciate, I lost the time to just be still and wonder at the beautiful things around me. I used to just sit by the door or my window for hours, drinking a cup of tea, doing nothing just staring at nature, just admiring it. I used to set aside a time for that, until I lost it. I have so many things to do now that takes me away from that meditation. I pray that I’ll have that time back.